ch-ch-ch-ch-changes

So I was checking out Amy's blog and as I read her post about writing down little things for which she is thankful I thought, "Damn, I could never do that. I am way too much of a curmudgeon." (Okay, so maybe I didn't think it in exactly those words, but that's the general idea.) Then I thought, "Do I really need to act so curmudgeonly?" (That's a real word; I spell-checked it.) I mean, I complain, like, constantly about basically everything I see/hear/do. Honestly, I am bad. I don't know how anyone puts up with me. I know I wouldn't. And really, I have no reason for it. I have a great life and a wonderful family. I know this, and yet I can't seem to let things go without a snide comment or a roll of the eyes. It's funny because I've reflected on this quite a bit recently; I've even tried a few times to stop being such a whiner, but I haven't been able to change my attitude. (This of course leads to me complaining about how I can't stop complaining and whammo, the bitch is back.) Anyway, motivated by Amy and in the spirit of the upcoming holiday season, I have decided to make yet another attempt at being more civil and benevolent towards my fellow human beings. I will start with an exercise in thankfulness in which I take things about which I normally would have complained and contemplate why these are the very things for which I should be giving thanks. (In no particular order:)

Complaint 1: My son is, um, rambunctious. Currently 20-months old, he climbs on the couch and window seat then throws himself off. He bites me. A lot. He completely ignores me when I say "no." He is not a fan of playing by himself; as a result it has become my duty to keep him constantly entertained. I am emotionally and physically drained at the end of the day.

Why I should be thankful for this: My son is a healthy 20-month-old. He has the ability to not only walk, but also to climb. Well. He bites because he is trying to give me kisses and is still learning how to do that. He bites me a lot because he loves me a lot. He still thinks "no" is a game because he's still a baby, really. (Disclaimer: This doesn't mean I let him get away with biting or misbehaving; only that I understand his reasons for doing so.) He doesn't really need to be entertained all the time. Part of my job as his mom is to help him learn to entertain himself, but really is it so bad that he wants to be with me so much? He's a pretty great kid; I should be glad he likes me. Yes, I'm tired at the end of the day, but that is because I have the privilege of staying home with him. He doesn't have to go to daycare. I don't have to leave him and go to work. This I know is wonderful. I spend a ton of quality time with my boy and I am extremely grateful. Plus, he's freakin' adorable. How can I not be thankful for that one?

Complaint 2: My husband is working crazy overtime. Monday through Thursday he works from 6-4:30, Friday through Sunday he works from 6-2:30. (Yep, he's on seven days a week at the mo'.)When he gets home, he's tired and I'm stressed. I want to get out of the house, he wants to stay in. At the same time, I haven't seen him all day and I'd like to, so doing different activities makes me feel guilty.

Why I should be thankful for this: Hubby working crazy hours means Hubby is healthy enough to work said hours. Also, the extra money means a bit more financial security, and that's nice to have when there's only one income. Not sure what there is to be thankful for in the "he's tired and I'm stressed" department, but I bet if I were to get off my arse and go to the gym or the movies (or knitting group) once or twice a week, my stress level would go way down and I would be able to enjoy the time we have together much more. Also, OT is almost finished and a light at the end of the tunnel is always something for which to be grateful.

And now I feel guilty that I've been blogging instead of hanging with the hubby. He's actually playing video games right now, so it's not like he's not having fun, but the guilt is there nonetheless. So, I'm going to see if he wants to play Yahtzee or something in which we actually interact with each other. I'll try to be more kind in "real life" and I'll post soon to let you know how it goes. I'll also try to post more thankful-type things. I'm sure you'll be waiting with bated breath. (Does it count as bitchy if I'm making fun of myself?)